$3 Moisturizer

I use a $3 moisturizer and I’m not afraid to admit it. If we’re being honest it’s $3 and some change. It works. It’s reliable. It’s economical to go thru tubs of the stuff in the winter.

Now when one buys a $3 moisturizer there is little glitz or glamor involved. It comes in a white tub with some pretty generic lettering.

When you’re one of the cheapest moisturizers at the box store you don’t really garner a great shelf space to call your own. I hope you’re still limber because these containers are stocked on the bottom shelf.

Here’s my take away from a tub of moisturizer:

You don’t have to be glitzy, glamorous or over the top to get people to notice you. I first saw this lotion as part of my own moms routine when I was in high school many moons ago. People buy it. The brand has staying power. Even if you aren’t flashy, people will notice your good qualities.

There’s nothing wrong with a modest living. This little tub doesn’t boast about its popularity.

Reliability is an unsung virtue. I seriously doubt the formula has change over the years. It still smells and feels the same. People like the consistency.

People will like you if you aren’t flashy. People will admire you for being a constant in their life. Money and success is great, but people want to know you for more than that.

Oh and the best part I forgot to add? For $3.97 your get 2 tubs… not just one!

Dirty Dishes

Real life: our hot water heater broke last week. It wasn’t like we were living with ice water, but we’re talking like warm showers at best while we waited to get it repaired.

Now that sucks. But here’s the best part. Six people eating three meals a day at home. I have Mt Everest of dirty dishes currently on my kitchen counter.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not someone who has to have a clean kitchen to sleep at night. However it reached epic proportions. Avalanche looming.

This is life. Real life. Dirty, messy, inconvenient life.

Too often we glamorize what we post on social media. I get why. No one wants to be the only hot mess. There’s considerable more eye appeal to a well decorated and cleaned home than a lived in one.

I’m going to tell you what I’ve found out.

We have comfort and acceptance when we admit our faults to like minded people. There’s times in our lives when we all need to do dishes, the floor has been 3 days past needed a vacuum, when was the last time that toddler had more than a sponge bath?

Whatever you’re dealing with this week know you aren’t alone. Find peace knowing we all have messes, if we air them in public or not.

I mean as long as there’s no steak knives in that dish avalanche I’ll probably be ok. When the time comes it’s tackled I’ll feel better. Deep down I know there’s someone out there, just like me, deciding if tonight’s the night to tackle it.

Do the Work

Long term love is hard.

It’s often down played, glamorized, the good days displayed on a billboard. The hard days hidden far from the public eye.

What happens on the days when the person who used to feel like home is the same person who makes you question everything? What do you do then?

No one wants to talk about those days. Even when you bring it up to friends they often skirt around the hard truths.

Some days people suck. Some days that person your person. The person who brought butterflies once now brings tension.

Do the hard work. The messy work. The dirty work. Remember why they are your person. Why they feel like home. Why they bring you comfort. Do the work you don’t want others to see.

I once read couples who fight still have passion. They still have something worth fighting for. Do the damn work no matter how hard.

Life and love aren’t easy. No one is perfect. Your spouse is human. You are human. To love is to forgive. To cherish. To wake up every day and make the choice to do the work.

Taboo Topics

Let’s talk about things we don’t always talk about.

I feel like when we share our Ag story, we don’t always share the nitty gritty. We live it, go thru it and deal with it. The last thing a lot of us want to do is to re-tell it. Often to people who don’t live it.

I don’t believe sharing your story should or has to be a tell all. However, I do think by leaving out the things we don’t always want to talk about, we are romanticizing agriculture.

It’s easy to want to farm when you see rainbows over barns, happy bouncy calves and fluffy sheep with lambs.

But sometime facilities need updated.

Calves get sick requiring medicine and time.

I’m fairly certain lambs are born tempting fate, constantly questioning death.

A Farm Bureau survey done in 2021 found that 61% of farmers states having some type of mental health issues. Those are the numbers people willingly contributed. I would guess there are more who are a little shy to share.

We lost 1.3 million acres of farm land in 2021. Some of these farms from retirement, some from financial instability, some people simply seeking a less stressful life.

Last year for the first time ever, divorce rates amongst farming couples reached the same level as the “general public”. There ain’t no stress like married farm life stress. Trying to separate home and barn is incredibly difficult. Add in the stress that is often experienced from multiple generations farming together.

In 2019 – 2021 Chapter 12 debt restructuring bankruptcy was the highest it had been in decades. While prices paid to farmers has increased, so did inputs. Leading to no financial gain and often times farms still experiencing losses.

To get in to a further taboo topic, the suicide rates amongst farmers is 6 times that of the general population. For many of the reasons above.

We cherry pick what we share on social media. It’s not fun or popular to share that your life is messy. Staged photos, smiling kids and perfect appearing farm life get easy likes.

Do I think we should change to all doom and gloom? Heavens no! I’m a fairly optimistic person. Just stop and realize many times there’s a lot more going on than what appears in the manicured picture.

Farmers are human and life is messy.

I’m at an awkward spot in sharing my story. Maybe it’s growing pains or growing frustrations. I’m not sure which.

I love sharing my story with people. Often times I find it relaxing to sit and write about my day. The highs, lows, frustrations, success. Generally someone can relate. From cows to kids to all the life in between.

One goal I’ve always had is to be open in my sharing. Farming is hard. We make hard decisions. Our little farm provides for our family. At the end of the day my big goal is for the farm to be ethical and economical.

I read a lot. Dairy publications, “mom” blogs, marketing, you name it. Very rarely for pleasure anymore. After lots of thinking I feel like I need to get this off my chest.

The consumer is not always right.

Now I’m open to conversations. I think we need to evolve to stay relevant. Farming is always changing. If you don’t adapt you get left behind.

But I also believe the majority of consumers trust us. Milk and dairy is a staple in the overwhelming majority of American diets.

Many consumers are several generations removed from farming and have never even touched a cow, let alone taken care of one. So when people ask me questions (or question) our practices, I generally gladly answer/interact. Most people just want to know the how’s and the whys.

I’m forever grateful for the large consumer base that trusts farmers. They acknowledge that we are intelligent people giving all we have to produce quality food for them.

There are always going to be squeaky wheels. People who make you question humanity. Sadly at times we think this group is the base of the majority.

I trust my consumers having confidence in me, just as they trust me to make quality dairy products for them.

So take this away: if you have questions ask! We generally have good explanations on the care we provide our cattle.

I’m at an awkward spot in sharing my story. Maybe it’s growing pains or growing frustrations. I’m not sure which.

I love sharing my story with people. Often times I find it relaxing to sit and write about my day. The highs, lows, frustrations, success. Generally someone can relate. From cows to kids to all the life in between.

One goal I’ve always had is to be open in my sharing. Farming is hard. We make hard decisions. Our little farm provides for our family. At the end of the day my big goal is for the farm to be ethical and economical.

I read a lot. Dairy publications, “mom” blogs, marketing, you name it. Very rarely for pleasure anymore. After lots of thinking I feel like I need to get this off my chest.

The consumer is not always right.

Now I’m open to conversations. I think we need to evolve to stay relevant. Farming is always changing. If you don’t adapt you get left behind.

But I also believe the majority of consumers trust us. Milk and dairy is a staple in the overwhelming majority of American diets.

Many consumers are several generations removed from farming and have never even touched a cow, let alone taken care of one. So when people ask me questions (or question) our practices, I generally gladly answer/interact. Most people just want to know the how’s and the whys.

I’m forever grateful for the large consumer base that trusts farmers. They acknowledge that we are intelligent people giving all we have to produce quality food for them.

There are always going to be squeaky wheels. People who make you question humanity. Sadly at times we think this group is the base of the majority.

I trust my consumers having confidence in me, just as they trust me to make quality dairy products for them.

So take this away: if you have questions ask! We generally have good explanations on the care we provide our cattle.

Happy? National Ag Day

National Ag Day began in 1973 to celebrate all that agriculture provides to the general population. It’s often marked by social media posts praising farmers, some agriculture related businesses having sales and certain youth groups providing lunches.

The fanfare is appreciated and it feels great to be recognized.

But I would be lying if I didn’t say I have mixed emotions on the day.

I love agriculture. The community, the lifestyle, the emotional highs. The thing is often times the highs feel so high because we’re recovering from the lows.

It’s like a tumultuous love affair. We’re always telling ourselves it’ll get better. Things will improve. Life won’t have as much stress. Prices will come up, costs will go down.

While I often preach we choose to live this way, it doesn’t always make the choice sit easier. Working a 60 hour week to budget money that you don’t know you’ll have wears on the toughest of minds.

Often on social media we share picturesque views, cute baby animals and tell people how lucky we are. And truth be told there are many, many things to love about farming. However I think we are often our own worst enemy when it comes to romanticizing farm life.

Some times we have to make hard choices. We have sleepless nights. Over/under eating from stress. Being an entrepreneur is riddled with chances and choices that you’ll always wonder if you made the right one. Farming takes it up a notch when you have a small margin of control over your products worth.

I’m not spilling all these thoughts for pity or looking for grace and praises. I’m simply sharing real life farming. Unglorified thoughts and emotions on this day of sharing of agriculture.

Thomas Jefferson once declared agriculture to be our wisest pursuit. In order to gain wisdom we have to go through hard things. Gain experience, good and bad. It may be our wisest pursuit because it is lived and experienced by some of our toughest people.

Going, Going Potty

My 3 year old is a smart kid. She’s quick, picks up on things easily and loves to learn.

Also, she isn’t potty trained.

She’s the youngest of 4 siblings. I remember way back to when my oldest was a toddler. I read all the parenting magazines and books. At 18 months you should begin potty training. Just chuck them in some little undies and in a weekend your diaper days will be over.

Oddly it didn’t work quite that way. She had no idea what was going on. We were all frustrated and my couch smelled faintly of urine.

I had another kid who potty trained at the arrival of a new sibling. He didn’t want to be like the baby.

One I was fairly certain would be going to kindergarten in pull-ups. Guess what, nope, he made his mind up it was time.

Kids do things at their own pace. Not much different than adults. We teach them. Reassure them. Love them. Sooner or later they decide that it’s not cool to pee your pants.

This kid has been different. We’ve gone at her pace. Some days she’s the potty master. Other days she makes no effort. The amazing thing? Those effort lacking days are really disappearing. She wants to make the effort. None of us have been frustrated or stressed. She wants to use the potty we go, she doesn’t I change her.

So yes. I have a 3 year old in pull ups. I’m not worried. Has anyone ever held your age at potty training against your qualifications as an adult? I think not.

You’re a Good Mom

The judgement on motherhood amazes me. The more amazing thing about it is this judgement is often from other mothers.

You can work and be a good mom.

You can own a business and be a good mom.

You can farm or ranch and be a good mom.

You can have a hobby and be a good mom.

You can spend time on the you and be a good mom.

You can, on occasion, lose your shit and be a good mom.

You can love endless cuddles and be a good mom.

You can despise cooking dinner every night and be a good mom.

You can chase your dreams and be a good mom.

Being a good mom has to deal with love, comfort and support. There is no magical thing that shuts off motherhood because you choose to still have your own identity once you have children. Often times I think it makes us better.

Be you. Chase dreams the dreams you had as a girl. Because there’s probably some girls (and/or boys) watching you!

No One Wants Facts

No one wants to read facts. Do you remember information you read in a text book 15-20 years ago?

No.

It’s boring. There’s little retention because you don’t have a connection with it.

The same is true for “agvocating”, running farm pages or sharing your story.

I can tell you posts that have the most interaction on my page share stories. Every day things. Rea life successes and failures. They relate me to you. Even if you’re 3 generations removed from agriculture we establish a connection over parenthood, coffee, quirks our spouse has or feeling like life is getting ahead of us.

People have less interest in regurgitated facts and more interest in human interest stories. Yea, I have cows but I also have a toddler I wonder if she’s human some days. I’ve assisted a ewe giving birth but sadly I spilled my coffee climbing the gate to help her.

When I first started this page and blog all I did was tell these amazing statistics. Holy snore. I was talking to a wall.

Over the years I have changed my narrative. I want you to know farmers are regular people who run on a lot of coffee, big dreams and little sleep. I’m sure a lot of people can relate to that.